No, no. Elie!
I swear, if i had a dime for every single time a gay guy told me his name was Elie.
A couple of weeks ago, I was chatting with this guy. Manly. Cute. My type.
He told me his name was… Let’s Call him Akhou Sharmouta.
So I chat with Akhou Sharmouta for a week before meeting him.
I ask him: “Listen, is your name REALLY Akhou Sharmouta? Cause I’ve been through that road before and I’m used to gays lying about their names!”
He tells me: “No, no! I swear! My name is Akhou Sharmuta!”
What am I to do? The guy’s 28 and I assume he’s outgrown the “lying about the name” phase. I believe him. Although it’s weird…who names their kid Akhou Sharmouta?
We go out on a date. We’re flirting. He’s cute.
Then at the end of the date, I accidentally bring up the topic of names and fake names. He doesn’t react and acts weird.
I suspect there’s something wrong and ask: “Wait, wait. Your name is Akhou Sharmouta, right”?
He says: “Well…not quite. I’m not Akhou Sharmouta”.
I didn’t see that one coming all over my face.
I drop him to his car and say sayonara.
I mean, seriously? What would I tell my kids? Daddy and Daddy met on Manjam and your daddy lied about his real name! How romantic!
ps: It’s still a mystery. He didn’t even have the decency to tell me his real name even after he was caught in a lie. Akhou Sharmouta? Akhou Manyouke? I would never know.
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